August 11, 2004
TERRORIST WARNING SIGNS
(A PRECISION GUIDED HUMOR ASSIGNMENT)
Terrorists can strike anywhere, anytime, so it's important for you to be able to spot them so you can stop them before the do something explodey. Here are some indications that the suspicious-looking person that you're eyeballing may, indeed, be a terrorist:
He claims to be a Syrian musician, but his "flute" has a banana clip and a laser sight.
He asks you if you've got a light, and he's holding up his shoe.
When you inform him politely that you don't smoke, he replies, "You will".
Babies don't normally tick.
If two men are attaching dynamite to a bridge and they're not Clint Eastwood and Eli Wallach, they're terrrorists.
Small yappy dogs aren't terrorists, they're terriers. Don't kill them unless they're REALLY annoying.
Check his shoes. If they say "Nuke" instead of "Nike", be suspicious.
If they say "Nike", but the shoelaces are doing some kind of sparky/smoky/burny thing, stuff him in the nearest toilet.
That small enclosure or closed container in which selected living plants and sometimes small land animals, such as turtles and lizards, are kept and observed is a terrarium, but you're getting warmer.
If you see someone unlawfully using or threatening to use force or violence against people or property with the intention of intimidating or coercing societies or governments, often for ideological or political reasons THEN you have found a terrorist.
Or a peace protestor
ยป The Alliance links with: Precision Guided Humor Round-up: How to Tell If Someone Is A Terrorist
Excerpt: If you're not sure how to tell the difference between someone who's completely harmless, and a filthy terrorist, go here and practice a bit. Meanwhile the following Alliance members have some helpful tips for spotting the baddies. Chase of Wide
Weblog: The Alliance
Tracked: August 11, 2004 08:27 PM
LOL! That was great. I needed that.
"Small yappy dogs aren't terrorists, they're terriers. Don't kill them unless they're REALLY annoying."
Can I kill the little rat dogs? Please?
PG - Fire at will :-)
E-Mail Me (Harvey)
TrackBack URL for this entry:
http://blog2.mu.nu/cgi/trackback.cgi/40695