KARNIVAL OF THE KIDZ: BAD UNCLE EDITION

I don't have any children myself, but I *do* have brothers & sisters with kids, which makes me an uncle.

A bad uncle.

Yeah, I'm the one that teaches the kids important life skills that they can use to drive their parents crazy.

Serves 'em right for letting me babysit.

So this week, a bunch of folks are dumping their brats in my lap, and it's my job to make sure they go away a little more creative then when they arrived...

ArmyWife of ArmyWifeToddlerMom submits a picture of a young Elton John... no... wait... that's Pink Ninja.

"If you pull on kitty's tail really hard, but then let go right away, he'll meow, but he won't have time to turn around and scratch you."

Oddybobo of Bobo Blogger gives us... fighter pilots? hunters? rap stars?... at any rate, there's two of 'em.

"Dip your finger in lighter fluid and then light it. The fuel all burns off before it gets too hot."

VW Bug of One Happy Dog Speaks has the boys out in the yard to watch the Discovery launch. Educational!

"No, seriously, you CAN light them. It makes a big ol' flame just like the shuttle taking off"

Sissy of And What Next... is a little fuzzy on the concept of "kid", since these pictures are from her teen-age years, but we'll roll with it.

"Just pour a little water into the bottle and your folks will never notice that some of it's missing"

Jody of Iowa Geek reminds me of why I'm childless - trying to get baby pictures taken. Round 1 and Round 2.

"Leaving your toys in the doorway makes it easier for mommy to find them so she can put them away."

Amy of Prochein Amy has no pictures of this tender mother-daughter moment... but I think the description precludes the need for a visual.

"Well... it MIGHT be small enough to flush down the toilet. Drop it in and give it a try."

Susie of Practical Penumbra has to dig way down to the bottom of the shoebox to remember when her niece was sweet & innocent.

"When you point at someone, always use your biggest finger so that it's easier for people to see."

Finally, here's an important lesson that I had to discover for myself, since *I* didn't have any cool uncles to teach me this sort of thing:

"When playing with the white sand that your parents brought home as a souvenier from Texas, make sure that you play with it in a carpeted area."

So... anyone need a babysitter?

Next stop: August 8th with Susie of Practical Penumbra

ATTENTION! Karnival of the Kidz needs hosts/hostesses for the August 15th and later editions. Volunteer now, or I'll babysit your kids!