July 08, 2006
IMAO: BEHIND THE BLOG
IMAO is celebrating its 4th blogiversary this Sunday and I thought this would be a good time to post an insider's perspective.
When they hear that I blog at IMAO, most people say "Oh! How wonderful to work for a man like Frank J., who oozes funny as effortlessly as Michael Moore's belly-rolls ooze sweat!"
Well, the oozing IS great, but there are... other aspects... to the position that are somewhat less glamorous. For example:
* During the original "IMAO Initiation Ceremony"... well, I'm forbidden to give specifics, but let's just say that there's a REASON that I curl up into a fetal position and start crying whenever I see jumper cables.
* When Frank J. refers to the "IMAO Editorial Board", he's actually talking about the two by four that he beats us with while screaming "WRITE FUNNIER!"
* Once a year, all the team members have to make a pilgrimmage to Florida to pee on his cat's head for luck.
* If you write a post that gets less than 10 comments, he makes you eat a live scorpion while he watches on a webcam.
* About once a month, Frank sends out an e-mail with the subject "I've got a GREAT idea!!!". Also about once a month, the balance in the "IMAO Bail Money Fund" drops to zero.
* When Frank J. cuts the IMAO paychecks, he writes "money for funny" on the memo line. Unfortunately, his crappy handwriting makes it look like "money for fellatio". I get the oddest looks at the bank.
But aside from those few little quirks, writing for IMAO is still a good gig. And I want to thank Frank for starting IMAO, keeping it going, and inviting me on board.
In gratitude, I bought him this little gift, which I hope he finds useful:
Must be eating a lot of scorpions lately with the whole simpsons trivia series. Yes, ouch.
csExcelent. Hey! Not do it Harvey "I used to think I was weird because of my penguin fetish, but not after finding out what Harvey does with a can of Reddi-Wip and a Slip-N-Slide. http://sashhardcore.dyubel.org/hardcore-teacher-sex.html
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