September 05, 2007

It's Either This, or Take Up Needlepoint

(cross-posted from IMAO)

Now that Alberto Gonzales has resigned, he'll have a lot of time on his hands. How will he fill it? I speculate thusly:


* Figure out why everyone keeps telling him they "don't need no steenkin' badges".

* Be seen in the same room as Speedy Gonzales to finally quell the rumors about them being the same person.

* Make midnight prank calls to those jackass prosecutors who got so snippy about being fired.

* Team up with Rumsfeld & Rove to form a Rush tribute band.

* No, I meant the rock group.

* Start a grassroots organization dedicated to bringing back the IMAO podcast.

* Keep playing Minesweeper 8 hours a day, just like when he worked for Bush. That game is like CRACK, I tell you!

* Accept the role of the hilariously mis-matched Hispanic sidekick in the remake of "Dirty Harry".

* Hang out in the Home Depot parking lot with the rest of his family.

* Write his obligatory insider tell-all book, tentatively titled "Hasta la Vista, Bushy!"

* Subtitled "Pendejo Estupido"

* See if Fred Thompson is interested in making an Affirmative Action hire.


Now if you'll excuse me, I gotta go see if he's got my lawn mowed yet.

posted by Harvey on September 5, 2007 at 04:10 AM | Permalink | 0 Liars | TrackBack | Funny On Purpose
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